LAUGH

1. You know that tingly little feeling you get when you really like someone you’ve just met? That’s common sense leaving your body.

2. Old age is not as bad as I thought. It’s a good feeling when you just don’t give a hoot anymore and you feel happy just to wake up in the morning.

3. Dear paranoid people who check behind shower curtains for murderers: if you find one, what’s your plan?

4. I decided to change calling the bathroom, ‘the John’ and renamed it ‘the Jim.’ I feel so much better saying I went to the Jim this morning.